Before we left, I took Austin to his Grandma Joy's house. We had a good visit and he took to her immediately. I left him on Friday morning and drove back to Nashville. I was supposed to get my ear drums cut open for the plane ride becaus ... read more
Don't you hate it when you tell the self-checkout register that you want cash back. Then by the time you're finished, because the $!? machine has screwed up so many times, you've forgotten all about the cash? Yep, if you want to get rich j ... read more
A struggling fisherman from an impoverished village in Thailand's Nakhon Si Thammarat province made an incredible discovery on the beach. 37-year old Hatchai Niyomdecha happened to be walking along the... ... read more
Had to park under an overpass this morning to avoid tornadoes. No problems for me but one did touch down right near work. Someone said it hit Macy's (just across the Interstate). ... read more
Hariri actually used the word "world" not "planet," which is entirely different, but neither the world nor the planet ever did need anyone in particular. Still, everyone (other than murderers, rapists and pedophiles) has the right to exist, and elitists like Hariri can go straight back to hell.
For most people, winning $300 million in the lottery would be enough. They would retire, buy a big house and travel the world. Not Benny. He took the money and ran... for president. The house he had in mind was the White House. He didn't want to travel the world so much as save it from politicians. Retire? "I'll retire when I'm dead!" he said, not knowing so many people had that exact retirement plan in mind for him.
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Benny sat alone by the door in a recently opened Asian restaurant. The laminated menu offered Mongolian, Chinese and Japanese dishes, with each written in its native language. He had to flip it over for the English version on the back.
He was taking his therapist's advice, "throwing caution to the wind" and "letting the chips fall where they may." A sex therapist branching out to grief counseling, she was all about the clichés.
The problem with the world is that intelligent people are full of doubts, while the stupid ones are full of confidence. The difference between a democracy and a dictatorship is that in a democracy you vote first and take orders later in ... read more
Remember back in 2020 when the entire world got an early April Fools joke with health officials giving the seasonal flu a new name, covid-19? And then those silly boys and girls in media began their fear and panic campaign? Almost everyone ... read more
Blonde in a hailstormA blonde is driving home and she gets caught in a really bad hail storm. The hail is as big as tennis balls, and she ends up with her car covered with large dents. So the next day she takes her car to the repair shop. ... read more
Today's my sister's birthday. She must be having a good one, because she has not replied to anyone's email birthday greeting. The previous weekend was our nephew's 2nd birthday party in Smyrna. That kid partied until it was almost dark!I ... read more
Got my genealogy DNA test results back. I have bits from all over the world:1% E. Central Africa1% Native American (Chile)5% Middle Eastern91% Europe (Portuguese, Flemish, German, Hungarian, Slovak)That leaves 2%, which I' ... read more
We made it this far! The plane ride was terrible for several minutes when we had to fasten our seat belts, which Elizabeth did not want to do. She SCREAMED loudly for quite a while, ticking off everyone nearby. Luckily, part of it was dro ... read more
Parenting Tip 426: When taking out recycling/trash, check its contents. I almost threw out our daughter's purse and wallet! parentingtips ... read more
Me (folding clothes): I need some of your hangers. Elizabeth: Here you go. Me: Wow, a variety of hanger types, thanks. Elizabeth: Well, I am diverse! Her friends are diverse, actually, but it's an inside joke with us about her overbearing ... read more
Just past Jackson, Tennessee, after getting onto 412, a trucker had some fun at my expense. I had just passed him and am 99% sure I hadn't merged back in front of him too close. Drivers around here are offended easily. He then came up ... read more
You probably can't fix it yourself, and your mechanic might not be able to, either. Almost a metaphor for our times. See Scotty Kilmer explains new car repair. By the way, this guy's great. In various ... read more
The Holmes Family Newsletter Vol. 1, No. 7, October 5, 1989Let's face it, these things are going to just keep coming. Steve arrested Steve received his first-ever speeding ticket recently. Of course, this is the first car he's ever had ... read more
The Happy Hairball(something we keep coughing up) Volume 5, Number 8 December 20, 1993 Publisher: This guy -gtgt Editor: Same guy Distributor: Brave little delivery boys and girls worldwide Address: Nashville, TN 37215 ... read more
the NEWS Vol. 2, No. 6, April 16, 1990Back in spite of popular demand. WORLD NEWS Mike is back from Germany and looking very European. (Fancy haircut, pale complexion, but otherwise healthy. ) He's having trouble getting used to speakin ... read more
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our 25th year! 
holmes family newsletter vol 6 no 6
california, what a trip
cash back
struggling fisherman finds rare pearl worth $330,000 while searching for food
tornadoes across tennessee
europe video (1996)
external news feeds
If food manufacturers would stop adding sugar to everything, it would help. 
CULTURE
charles bukowski quotes
winston churchill quotes
the delta variant
music by a brother
blonde jokes
FAMILY
sister's birthday
light at the end of the tunnel
my own genealogy
back in moscow (12/18/2007)
parenting tip #426
diversity
LIFE
your community business blueprint: key steps to launch and thrive
dare to be nice
safeguards for seniors: essential tips to prevent financial exploitation
notes from the road to doug's house... and mark twain's boyhood home
scotty kilmer explains new car repair
NEWSLETTER
holmes family newsletter vol 1 no 7
holmes family newsletter vol 5 no 2
holmes family newsletter vol 5 no 8
holmes family newsletter vol 3 no 6
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